How to Win Friends and Influence Our European Allies
19 September 2005
EXCLUSIVE: UP IN FLAMES
Tons of British aid donated to help Hurricane Katrina victims to be BURNED by Americans
From Ryan Parry, US Correspondent in New York
HUNDREDS of tons of British food aid shipped to America for starving Hurricane Katrina survivors is to be burned.
US red tape is stopping it from reaching hungry evacuees.
Instead tons of the badly needed Nato ration packs, the same as those eaten by British troops in Iraq, has been condemned as unfit for human consumption.
EXCLUSIVE: UP IN FLAMES
Tons of British aid donated to help Hurricane Katrina victims to be BURNED by Americans
From Ryan Parry, US Correspondent in New York
HUNDREDS of tons of British food aid shipped to America for starving Hurricane Katrina survivors is to be burned.
US red tape is stopping it from reaching hungry evacuees.
Instead tons of the badly needed Nato ration packs, the same as those eaten by British troops in Iraq, has been condemned as unfit for human consumption.
posted by BigBubba at 7:09 PM
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14 Comments:
Funny Samwich! RvW! A reasonable question. The answer puzzles the "reasonable" mind by seeming to be "unreasonable" until wit detects the phonic parallels and symmetry that make the answer seem reasonable again. And then I laugh. Comedy.
It's a shame that the information content is not useful except in assessing the wit and propensities of the man originally answering the question... and as to whether it was "deliberately" done by "art" or a serendipidous Freudian slip.
PS - Are you sure from #11 on, they aren't talking about the America/Britain relationship?
-FJ
I guess the problems getting the food in highlight just how "not free" trade really is between nations. You may not have tariffs. Instead, you set standards. Like no "Frankenfood" is allowed into Europe from the US. No mad-cow Mo-o-o-o-o-e-e-e-e-o-o-o-o beef from the UK or Canada. Gotta love lawyers and pirates. They're always looking for the loophole.
-FJ
Did anyone celebrate the International Talk Like a Pirate Day yesterday? I walked around saying things like "the party of the first part did deliver a writ of habeus corpus to the party of the second part". Nobody "got it".
-FJ
Note...mr. ducky to Condi..."Get thee to a nunnery!"
Shakespeare "Hamlet" (Act 3, Scene 1, lines 103-164)
HAMLET-Ha, ha! Are you honest?
OPHELIA-My lord?
HAMLET-Are you fair?
OPHELIA-What means your lordship?
HAMLET-That if you be honest and fair, your honesty should admit no discourse to your beauty.
OPHELIA-Could beauty, my lord, have better commerce than with honesty?
HAMLET-Ay, truly; for the power of beauty will sooner transform honesty from what it is to a bawd than the force of honesty can translate beauty into his likeness. This was sometime a paradox, but now the time gives it proof. I did love you once.
OPHELIA-Indeed, my lord, you made me believe so.
HAMLET-You should not have believed me, for virtue cannot so inoculate our old stock but we shall relish of it. I loved you not.
OPHELIA-I was the more deceived.
HAMLET-Get thee to a nunnery. Why wouldst thou be a breeder of sinners? I am myself indifferent honest, but yet I could accuse me of such things that it were better my mother had not borne me: I am very proud, revengeful, ambitious, with more offences at my beck than I have thoughts to put them in, imagination to give them shape, or time to act them in. What should such fellows as I do crawling between earth and heaven? We are arrant knaves all; believe none of us. Go thy ways to a nunnery. Where's your father?
OPHELIA-At home, my lord.
HAMLET-Let the doors be shut upon him, that he may play the fool nowhere but in's own house. Farewell.
OPHELIA-O help him, you sweet heavens!
HAMLET-If thou dost marry, I'll give thee this plague for thy dowry: be thou as chaste as ice, as pure as snow, thou shalt not escape calumny. Get thee to a nunnery. Go, farewell. Or if thou wilt needs marry, marry a fool, for wise men know well enough
what monsters you make of them. To a nunnery, go, and quickly too. Farewell.
OPHELIA-Heavenly powers, restore him!
HAMLET-I have heard of your paintings, well enough. God hath given you one face, and you make yourselves another. You jig and amble, and you lisp; you nickname God's creatures, and make your wantonness your ignorance. Go to, I'll no more on't; it hath made me mad. I say we will have no moe marriage. Those that are married already--all but one--shall live. The rest shall keep as they are. To a nunnery, go.
(Exit)
OPHELIA-O what a noble mind is here o'erthrown! The courtier's, soldier's, scholar's, eye, tongue, sword, The expectancy and rose of the fair state, The glass of fashion and the mould of form,
The observed of all observers, quite, quite down! And I, of ladies most deject and wretched,
That sucked the honey of his musicked vows, Now see that noble and most sovereign reason, Like sweet bells jangled, out of time and harsh, That unmatched form and feature of blown youth Blasted with ecstasy. O, woe is me, To have seen what I have seen, see what I see!
-FJ
Shaekespeare, "Hamlet"
Hamlet - O, I die, Horatio; The potent poison quite o'er-crows my spirit: I cannot live to hear the news from England; But I do prophesy the election lights On Fortinbras: he has my dying voice; So tell him, with the occurrents, more and less, Which have solicited.--the rest is silence.
[Dies.]
Horatio-Now cracks a noble heart.--Good night, sweet prince, And flights of angels sing thee to thy rest! Why does the drum come hither?
[March within.]
[Enter Fortinbras, the English Ambassadors, and others.]
Fort.-Where is this sight?
Hor.-What is it you will see?
If aught of woe or wonder, cease your search.
Fort.-This quarry cries on havoc.--O proud death, What feast is toward in thine eternal cell, That thou so many princes at a shot So bloodily hast struck?
1 Ambassador.-The sight is dismal;
And our affairs from England come too late: The ears are senseless that should give us hearing, To tell him his commandment is fulfill'd That Rosencrantz and Guildenstern are dead: Where should we have our thanks?
Hor.-Not from his mouth,
Had it the ability of life to thank you: He never gave commandment for their death. But since, so jump upon this bloody question, You from the Polack wars, and you from England, Are here arriv'd, give order that these bodies High on a stage be placed to the view; And let me speak to the yet unknowing world
How these things came about: so shall you hear Of carnal, bloody and unnatural acts; Of accidental judgments, casual slaughters; Of deaths put on by cunning and forc'd cause; And, in this upshot, purposes mistook Fall'n on the inventors' heads: all this can I
Truly deliver.
Fort.-Let us haste to hear it,
And call the noblest to the audience. For me, with sorrow I embrace my fortune: I have some rights of memory in this kingdom, Which now, to claim my vantage doth invite me.
Hor.-Of that I shall have also cause to speak, And from his mouth whose voice will draw on more:
But let this same be presently perform'd, Even while men's minds are wild: lest more mischance On plots and errors happen.
Fort.-Let four captains Bear Hamlet like a soldier to the stage;
For he was likely, had he been put on, To have prov'd most royally: and, for his passage, The soldiers' music and the rites of war Speak loudly for him.--
Take up the bodies.--Such a sight as this Becomes the field, but here shows much amiss. Go, bid the soldiers shoot.
[A dead march.]
[Exeunt, bearing off the dead bodies; after the which a peal of ordnance is shot off.]
---
Does the Hawk fancy himself NOT a handsaw?
-FJ (R? or G?)
The soldiers of our Queen
Are full of spit and polish;
Our boots are always clean,
The foe we will demolish.
And so we sing this song
To demonstrate our forces;
We're bold and fierce and strong,
Admired by our horses.
We're bold and fierce and strong,
Admired by our horses.
...made summer by this duque of York. Red vs White united in freindly tether. Patience boys, patience, for all the world's a stage.
-FJ
Samwich, I know that you are already delirious. I hope on your fishing trip happy is thrown into the mix and you are deliriously happy.
BB,
methinks I need a brief sabbatical to drink from pure waters. The mixed groundwater has become too contaminated for my already indelicate support system. But I rise to leave here with a non-humerous thought. mr. ducky, get off my bust of Pallas!
Nitey-nite story (Homer, "Odyssey")
"Then thus Minerva in Laertes' ear:
"Son of Arcesius, reverend warrior, hear! Jove and Jove's daughter first implore in prayer, Then, whirling high, discharge thy lance in air." She said, infusing courage with the word. Jove and Jove's daughter then the chief implored, And, whirling high, dismiss'd the lance in air. Full at Eupithes drove the deathful spear: The brass-cheek'd helmet opens to the wound; He falls, earth thunders, and his arms resound. Before the father and the conquering son Heaps rush on heaps, they fight, they drop, they run Now by the sword, and now the javelin, fall The rebel race, and death had swallow'd all; But from on high the blue-eyed virgin cried; Her awful voice detain'd the headlong tide: "Forbear, ye nations, your mad hands forbear From mutual slaughter; Peace descends to spare." Fear shook the nations: at the voice divine They drop their javelins, and their rage resign. All scatter'd round their glittering weapons lie; Some fall to earth, and some confusedly fly. With dreadful shouts Ulysses pour'd along, Swift as an eagle, as an eagle strong. But Jove's red arm the burning thunder aims: Before Minerva shot the livid flames; Blazing they fell, and at her feet expired; Then stopped the goddess, trembled and retired.
"Descended from the gods! Ulysses, cease; Offend not Jove: obey, and give the peace."
So Pallas spoke: the mandate from above The king obey'd. The virgin-seed of Jove, In Mentor's form, confirm'd the full accord, And willing nations knew their lawful lord."
---
Arhtur Schopenhaeur "The World as Will and Representation". Not One or the other but Both or none. The proportions were once agreed upon. I spit on better cooks.
Fenelon, Rousseau gave your book written for the Sun King, "Telemachus", to women to read. Young boys he gave "Robinson Crusoe", so that by the time they had grown up, they learned the laws of Zeus and could survive in the jungles of the city. Today, YOU do the opposite. Fools! You aim at NONE.
-FJ
samwich
1,2 (time and time plural[impossible in this universe]) and 1 divided (Platonically 1/2). Sacred Math.
1 + 2 + 1/2 = 3 1/2
In other words, something "Divine" has to be part of the mix. But the units of "measure" (you called years) are of this world, not Divine and Eternal. So it can't be years. It is incalculable.
Are you familiar with the legend of the shooters during the Gigantomachy? Gigantomachy Legend It sometimes took a man and a god working together to slay a Giant. The gods could not do it all by themselves.
My mission is to throw at the gods of those who wish to overthrow the Olympian gods. Be they Giants, Amazons, Satyrs, or other men still fighting the Iliad. I act on Pallas' advice discharging my lance high into the air and thereby like Laertes become her Spearman. Therefore I engage in the war of ideas and assume the guise of heterodoxy.
But in reality, I simply wish to place rocks on people's heads. To add solidity and firmness to their thoughts and prevent them from "flying off" and so I try and give them a place to land.. the "because". I try to give them the "means" as well as showing the "other" end.
You place tinfoil around them. But many times, the same thoughts keep bouncing around and around and eventually find their way out again. Especially on the internet. And especially when dressed in the right accessories.
The oligarchy is one, not two. It has bought off or seduced many of the original guardian "eagles" and contaminated their wells. The Order of Redmen became the Improved Order of Redmen. Then came other changes. Change is the enemy, but an enemy that can't be stopped.
Did you know that the EPA is trying to regulate cow flatulence now? How long will it be before we humans will have to pay the fart tax? Why don't they tax the internet instead, they must have a good reason. Perhaps they see it as a means of promoting the sale of half-baked pies that will keep people's minds occupied. Half-baked apple pies is what the oligarchs need to keep us all busy, while they transfer the wealth of the world into their own pockets. The land. And once they have it, we will be evicted from it.
Government, in general, is the Leviathan. SOme want a one-world version, some an American version. The era of big government is over. Talk about a "mission accomplished" speech. Let's go back to the original compromise, the Constitution and separate church and state. But this time, lets also separate non-church and state. Half-baked ideas need to be kept out of a governments head, but left in the individuals head, where it belongs. And social justice, multiculturalism, progressive ideas are simply that, half-baked religions. Limits upon government need to be FIRMLY set. But as usual, the pirates have found a lot of loopholes.
-FJ
PS - And Seaport's like Boston and New York always contain "Nests" of pirates.
-FJ
Hey, neadertals used to burn dino-chips (not really, unless you enjoyed Ringo Starr in 1,000,000 Years BC) Indians and Plains Settlers burned buffalo chips. Animal dung has been heating homes since Prometheus gave fire to man. And NOW you decide it needs to be EPA monitored???? I'm gonna get a scientist to monitor you for flatulence and get him to prove that you are as big a polluter as your average farm animal.
-FJ
Animal wastes are a huge problem for agricultural producers. Flatulence produced by large herds of grazing animals could theoretically be a problem.
And why is that BB? Is it because the waste spread over the fields as fertilizer might run off into a stream after a downpour and pollute it beyond some EPA set level? Or is it because some modern farming methods now cage animals in very close quarters, stacking cages and allowing the concentrations of animal wastes to accumulate to previously unimagined densities, which then run off as a "concentrate" into the streams and lakes and bays after a heavy downpour and result in algea blooms and fishkills?
Animal cities of pigs and chickens are not allowed? I'd better call PETA! But then maybe not, I'd then have to install air conditioners and bring the pigpens in line with local housing codes.
This has never happened in the past with human cities? The Thames, the Seine, and Tiber rivers were once open sewers. The cities still got along, and eventually cleaned them up. But the problem wasn't simply the animals. It was the humans. You think just becuase we run an outfall pipe into the middle of the ocean, we aren't just moving a cities problem to someplace else where it can't be seen?
But I will ask a question that perhaps might hit home a little harder. If the earth were left on her own totally untouched by man, would there that many less animals farting in the wild? Would there be less plant life dying and eventually rotting or being eaten? Didn't those herds of buffalo and dinosaurs poop? And what happened to that poop? Enquiring minds want to know.
And isn't all that oil we're burning just a stored accumulation of animal and plant rot and poop? Should we build storage facilities in Nevada to store the poop for a million years trying to be very careful that no poop or oil and gas that might form might leak into the local ground water or air?
I'll admit, I hate crawing into hog pens and mucking them out. I'll even admit it stinks to high heaven. At one time, our home farm was bordered on three sides by some of our more modern high intensity hod farming operations. It smelled awful, no matter which way the wind blew, and we weren't raising hogs there. But other than the local owner operators and us, it wasn't something we needed the government to help us with.
But even when we raised hogs ourselves, with plenty of room for them to range about, it always stank. And when we loaded all the manure into the spreaders and spread it over the fields, it stank even worse.
City folk aren't used to having to hold their noses because they live in sanitized and isolated carbon-monoxide stink-less holes of their own making. They've taken the stink out the tailpipes, but some stank filled country air might leave them a little healthier, for all they know. And their own stank, they mostly dump on other places, like New Jersey or Staten Island.
And global warming, get over it! We're currently living in an un-natural warm de-glaciating temperature spike in the middle of an Ice Age. In another thousand years, we'll be looking for all those dried up cow pies to heat our caves again. What will we do if they're not there to burn?
;-)
-FJ
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